There is something fishy in the air… my 2008 Macworld prediction

There’s about 2 hours before Steve Jobs stands before a ravenous, crazed room of less-than objective reporters who sense of reality has been relatively obscured by some unknown field who’s effect seems to have greater impact once Steve Jobs actually takes the stage. Yes, Steve Jobs will be taking part in what has affectionately become known as the Stevenote… the Macworld keynote speech at which Steve will wow us with something bedazzlingly new, some unheard of gadget so incredible that we can’t have imagined life on earth before he bestowed knowledge of such an item upon us… or so we are compelled to believe without rational thought or objective criticism until we actually break free of the [reality distortion field]( “Reality distortion field – Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia”) (which can take anywhere from a few hours to a few weeks).

All of this pressure to continually come up with new thing-a-mabobbers each and every year, and the continual pressure to live up to the rumor sites building expectations… it’s a lot for a hippie throwback like Steve to take. Let’s face it, he’s no spring chicken anymore. The force is weakening. I mean sure, Yoda could lift an X-wing fighter at 200 plus years of age but look what it did to him. And that pails in comparison to controlling the minds of hundreds of otherwise curmudgeonly reporters willing to write bad things of Apple the other 364 days of the year.

So that’s why my prediction for the 2008 Macworld Stevenote is this:
In lieu of Steve’s failing powers Apple has developed a new device, code named (aptly enough) Yoda which is a small device, about the size of an iPhone, blue in color, with a button on it… it’s the first ever [RDF]( “Reality distortion field – Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia”) amplifier called the iField. Seriously… “There is something in the air”? Uh…yeah… it’s the iField!

Initially aimed at the iPod market, you know, kids who want their parent to believe their homework is done, the actual implications for this device are wide ranging with potential uses for CEO’s, board of directors, head of the PTA, husbands… why this device could have such broad appeal that this could very well launch Apple shares into the stratosphere… like $50 or $60… or something really big even.

You watch in two hours time. If Steve is indeed holding a blue box with a button, my predictions are at least partly true. If he says nothing about the iField it’s only because he is just beta testing it. If the iField is in fact working, you won’t even recall reading this article.

Headphones not included.

[tags]Stevenote, Macworld, keynote, Air, iField, Steve Jobs[/tags]